My assvice for others (warning: TMI)

-If you've had constipation problems before
-If you've tried upping your fiber and water and taking walks
-If you've even tried an IVF risque cup of coffee to get things moving
-If you've taken stool softeners 3 times a day since starting the bcp
-If you tried milk of magnesia and still had NO result
-If you had to help small, rock hard pebbles 'escape'
-If you've tried everything, DO NOT....


Take the  maximum THREE stimulant laxatives right before dinner.  Because if you do that you will crap your pants in your sleep.

Spotting help!

So yesterday I started spotting - it was light pink/grayish when I wiped. Then last night I had two episodes of light brown on my panty liner.  Last night and this morning after I inserted the endometrin there was light red/brown on the applicator when I removed it.

Cramps are pretty much the same they have been on and off since retrieval - like light AF cramps.

My reading and talking with friends has educated me that a.) endometrin vaginal suppositories can cause cervical irritation, capillary breakage and spotting and that b.) IVF pregnancies in general are notorious for spotting, especially when more than one embryo was transferred.

So rationally I know that everything is probably fine...but I HATE IT!

Also I don't feel like the 2nd lines of the First Response pregnancy tests I have been taking are getting darker enough - I mean they are definitely darker day to day but not as much as I thought they'd be.

Digital Clearblue today said pregnant - and according to peeonastick.com it registers for bhcg greater than 50.  So I think the level must be going up?

My official beta with the RE is tomorrow morning.  Oh God I hope it has gone up sufficiently. Please!

4dp5dt

So should I test starting tomorrow?  Or should I not?  I've promised DH I won't because he is out of town for work this week and gets back beta day (Thursday).  BUT I think I deserve the chance to POAS in private.   Fertiles get to! They have the opportunity to know before anyone else that they are pregnant - or that they are not.

But I'm scared.  Really scared.

What I wouldn't give for a little implantation spotting!  I've had cramps/twinges on and off since retrieval but last night into today I got cramps.  Feels exactly like AF coming - which I have read can be a good thing but I just don't know how it could be.  Every time I wipe I pray for a little pink.

And my BOOBS!  I thought my boobs were sore before AF but that is nothing compared to this progesterone pain.  I am aware of them at all times - like they are throbbing.

SO.  I took a test yesterday just to see if trigger was out and it was - nice and blank, a perfect negative.

IF I was to test when should I?  In my heart of hearts I'd like to be strong but my God I am weak!  So who knows...if I do and it's negative I'm going to lie and say I didn't.  Cause that's how I roll - what I pee on is my business.

Sleeplessness

Is that a word?

Has anyone else experienced this?  I don't know if it is the hormones or nerves or what but I find myself only sleeping about 3 hours at a time.  I think I am getting a full 8 hours but just in shifts.  I fell asleep at 12:30 last night and woke up at 3:45 wide awake.  Sucks!

My pain is almost gone now.  The endometrium vag suppositories are going good - I am wearing a full size pad instead of a panty liner and I think that has helped the yuck factor a little bit.  The only side effects I have noticed from the added progesterone are sore breasts and darker veins on the girls.

I am so ready for the call from the embryologist this morning!  I will probably wait up for her call and then back to bed.  Have a good weekend everybody!  And grow embies, grow!!!

Pulled the trigger

Well now reading all of your comments I am not sure I did the right thing..but I triggered.  And I didn't call the after hours number.  I mean the doctor knows my follie count and knows my E2 level...he wouldn't have had the nurse call me and tell me to trigger if it wasn't a good idea, right??

My abdomen is so full!  Sitting on the toilet hurts, rolling over hurts, my stupid cat jumping on it over and over again hurts.  I better get a lot of eggs out of this!

I can think of 3 worst case scenarios -
a. all embryos frozen (if this happens I will be ok mentally, may or may not prevent mod to severe OHSS.) b. transfer as scheduled with no preg and severe OHSS
c. transfer as scheduled with pregnancy confirmed and even worse OHSS

For those of you that have dealt with this - how will they decide to transfer or not?  Ultrasound between ER and ET to look for accumulations of fluid? Repeat e2 level?  How I feel?

Stims Day 10

So tonight is my last night of stims, tomorrow morning my final (hopefully) monitoring appt.  I feel so much better mentally than I did the other day.  I have decided to stop obsessing and go with the flow - our RE must know what he is doing.  Mostly I am thankful that I am producing - I am keeping my fingers crossed that the follies are the appropriate size tomorrow for trigger tomorrow night and retrieval Thursday. 

Physically I am slowly feeling worse - but nothing I can't handle - I have a headache that tylenol won't ease, nausea that Zofran is helping, bloat that is RIDICULOUS!, abdominal pain when I move to quickly or bend over, I feel weird when I pee (not UTI weird, just like it is kinda pressured?) and I feel feverish (but don't have a fever).  I assume this is all normal with my elevating estrogen.

Thanks for all of the kind words of support y'all!  I have no clue how I'd be getting through this without this amazing community!

Stims Day 6

I am feeling FULL!  Especially on my right side.  It will be interesting to see what is going in there on Saturday.  It kinda feels like it does when you run too fast - like a pinch in the side.  It is not terrible by any means but it is making me take things slower and be more cautious.  I really can't imagine what I will feel like by the time retrieval comes around.

DH is out of town so that's been hard.  He doesn't get back until 2 nights before retrieval.  It's sucky being alone.  I knew this was going to happen when we signed up for this month but it doesn't mean I am happy about it.  Every time I am in that damn clinic there are several couples in the waiting room - not once have I seen a woman by herself other than me.  It's practically humiliating.

I am at work now...I work 12 hour shifts nights on my feet (guess what I do?).  I work this Sunday and Monday night - I am afraid of how I'm gonna feel by then - I do lots of lifting and bending over - is there a danger of me rupturing my follicles?  Dr Alan gave me no work restrictions whatsoever - and actually had the gall to say I could go back to work later the same day as retrievel??!!  Don't worry, after Monday night I have made it so I have 2 weeks off of work, which should cover from the day before retrieval to at least 5 days post transfer (depending on when transfer and retrieval happen of course!). 

Have a good weekend everyone!

24 hours til stims!

First of all, does anyone else notice how many BFPs have been announced lately?  Congrats ladies and gents!  It fills me with hope right now - but if I get a bfn and drop off the commenting universe briefly please understand.

I am feeling really good today.  After a dose of Phillips Milk of Magnesia I finally have a little relief :)  I have decided that once stims start I am limiting myself to these over the counter meds :(I put this list together  form a combination of your guys' thoughts, my own common sense, and google)  tylenol for pain, colace and glycerin suppositories for constipation, and Benadryl 25mg for any insomnia.

ACNE.  Anyone else?  I almost never break out, and right now I have 3(!) huge monsters on my face - one that's redness reaches about the circumference of a dime.  Between that, the constipation and bruised abdomen I am feeling sexy, y'all!

Tonight will be my last combo dose of:

Lupron 10 units

Prenatal

Baby aspirin

Tomorrow start:

Lupron 3 units

Bravelle 300 units

Menopur 75 units

Prenatal

Baby aspirin

This weekend I am going to RRRREEEELLLLAAAAXXXX.  DH finally finished writing his dissertation and I am actually off work so we are gonna do the quality time thing - movies, board games, dinner out, maybe even church (yikes, it's been a long while...like a year).  I've already requested breakfast in bed for saturday - I deserve some pampering!!!!

Have a good weekend everyone!  I am off to take a walk - I lost 10 pounds in the 2 months prior to starting IVF - and I am really worried about plumping right back up.  Too bad I can't stop eating :)  Seriously food tastes so good right now....

Lupron Day 2

Today I've had two 3 hour naps, thousands of trips to the bathrooms, 3 bowls of soup and several glasses of apple juice and am finally feeling better.  I think I will make it to work tomorrow thank god.  Thank you all for stopping by and wishing me well!  I never knew constipation could be so horrific!  From here on out I am adding a stool softener to my daily meds.

Day 2 of Lupron went well.  I was a little more nervous while giving myself the shot - yesterday I was so horribly sick that I just drew it up and plunged it in without much thought.  No added side effects that I can tell thus far.  Only 3 more days of birth control, yippee!!!!

I read a fabulous book today in between naps.  It is written by an infertile woman and seems like a very honest account of what infertility does to your marriage, friendships and sanity.  I highly recommend it -

Here they are..

First of all, congrats Foxy!  I love you girl!

So my day yesterday was a doozy.  First of all, my meds came :

I took my first Lupron injection and it was fine.  Everything is organized, right down to my Believe card for inspiration :)

Here was the sucky part of my day...I have had abdominal pain all week which I thought was cramping from the saline sonogram.  Well yesterday I realized I had some pretty serious bowel backing up type problems.  I don't want to go into detail but it was like a battle field in my bathroom.  Home remedies didn't help.  I called the RE and he said it wouldn't be caused from my meds, he had no idea what was going on.  I called my primary doc and she told me to go to the ER.  3 enemas, a cat scan, blood work and iv zofran and I have a possible diagnosis of IBS.  The ER doc thought it might have been triggered from the hormonal changes from the pill.  All of this sucks but whatever,  the problem is I still have barely gone...just a little in the ER.  I am waiting for CVS to open so I can get filled the Go-Lytley to empty out my colon-it's supposed to be god-awful so this weekend is just gonna bite the big one.  I had to call in last night and for tonight  which just sucks, I am using up vacation days left and right.

Wish me luck!

Has anyone else heard of BCP causing this?

Med schedule as of yesterday:

Baby Aspirin

Prenatal

BCP

Lupron 10 units subq

Zofran 4 mg PRN