Sleep - besides the reflux (which seems to be under control thank the Lord) this has been our biggest frustration.
Pipsqueak has never liked sleeping alone. From day one she never slept longer than an hour or so when laid down by herself. When we roomed in at the hospital she cried in her little plastic bassinet almost constantly. At home we used a bassinet, a pack and play, and tried a snuggle nest (BIG WASTE OF $50!). By the end of 2 weeks I was so sleep deprived I was falling asleep in the rocking chair with her in my arms. So I brought her to our bed. My husband was against it but I HAD TO GET SOME SLEEP. And it has worked mostly. Breast feeding is much more convenient when you have your baby right there.
Naps have always been a struggle. She will nap for 2-3 hours if you hold her, but put her down (while she is sound asleep mind you) and you get anywhere from 5 to (rarely) 45 minutes. So for many months I resigned myself to holding her while she slept. This is ok but prevents me from getting anything done.
She absolutely cannot self soothe at all.
We tried cry it out a couple nights ago. I never thought I would try it but we are getting desperate. Every 10 minutes we went in and stroked her head, replaced the paci, told her we were there and quietly stepped out. She was in her crib, snug as a baug, fed, burped, dry, and in a dark room.
SHE WAS PISSED.
She screamed almost every single minute and after an hour and a half we gave up.
Just now I let her cry for a half hour trying to get her down for a nap and she screamed the whole time.
I am not attempting sleep training to try to get her to sleep through the night (although I just read a blog of quads sleeping 12 hours straight at 4 months and damn near killed myself out of jealousy) i just want her to gain some self soothing practice. I mean DAMN.
Any ideas?? The Dr Sears advice is get them completely asleep before you lay them down. I've tried it. She is completely out and limp limbed and everything and still she wakes up minutes later screaming. I've tried CIO and all it seems to do is traumatize her. Last evening we let her kinda sorta cry some but every time she woke my husband would stand by her crib, stroke her hair, and kinda help her soothe back down. He repeated this like 8 times in an hour.
She is waking now every day at like 5:45am. She used to sleep til 11am. She still refuses to go to sleep (even in our arms usually) before 9 or 10. So only like 8 hours at night (and also waking up 2-3 times to nurse in the night). Then yesterday I refused to let her nap anywhere but her crib. She probably cumulatively got only an hour of sleep ALL DAY after only 8 no- consecutive hours of sleep at night. THIS IS NOT HEALTHY!
ALL ADVICE WELCOME!!!!!!
Pipsqueak has never liked sleeping alone. From day one she never slept longer than an hour or so when laid down by herself. When we roomed in at the hospital she cried in her little plastic bassinet almost constantly. At home we used a bassinet, a pack and play, and tried a snuggle nest (BIG WASTE OF $50!). By the end of 2 weeks I was so sleep deprived I was falling asleep in the rocking chair with her in my arms. So I brought her to our bed. My husband was against it but I HAD TO GET SOME SLEEP. And it has worked mostly. Breast feeding is much more convenient when you have your baby right there.
Naps have always been a struggle. She will nap for 2-3 hours if you hold her, but put her down (while she is sound asleep mind you) and you get anywhere from 5 to (rarely) 45 minutes. So for many months I resigned myself to holding her while she slept. This is ok but prevents me from getting anything done.
She absolutely cannot self soothe at all.
We tried cry it out a couple nights ago. I never thought I would try it but we are getting desperate. Every 10 minutes we went in and stroked her head, replaced the paci, told her we were there and quietly stepped out. She was in her crib, snug as a baug, fed, burped, dry, and in a dark room.
SHE WAS PISSED.
She screamed almost every single minute and after an hour and a half we gave up.
Just now I let her cry for a half hour trying to get her down for a nap and she screamed the whole time.
I am not attempting sleep training to try to get her to sleep through the night (although I just read a blog of quads sleeping 12 hours straight at 4 months and damn near killed myself out of jealousy) i just want her to gain some self soothing practice. I mean DAMN.
Any ideas?? The Dr Sears advice is get them completely asleep before you lay them down. I've tried it. She is completely out and limp limbed and everything and still she wakes up minutes later screaming. I've tried CIO and all it seems to do is traumatize her. Last evening we let her kinda sorta cry some but every time she woke my husband would stand by her crib, stroke her hair, and kinda help her soothe back down. He repeated this like 8 times in an hour.
She is waking now every day at like 5:45am. She used to sleep til 11am. She still refuses to go to sleep (even in our arms usually) before 9 or 10. So only like 8 hours at night (and also waking up 2-3 times to nurse in the night). Then yesterday I refused to let her nap anywhere but her crib. She probably cumulatively got only an hour of sleep ALL DAY after only 8 no- consecutive hours of sleep at night. THIS IS NOT HEALTHY!
ALL ADVICE WELCOME!!!!!!
I blame all sleeping problems on teething. Sleep has always been a mystery to me, so I won't offer any advice. A is 91/2 months old and FINALLY (well, the past 3 nights) he is asleep by 8:15 (after some crying to sleep) wakes around 2:30 (go in and soothe back to sleep--not pick up!) and wakes at 6:00ish. I am sure that will change tomorrow!
ReplyDeleteInfant advil helps us over here.
Hey Marianne...oh sleep deprivation is such a vicious cycle for both you and baby. THe more tired she is the worse her sleep will be. It sounds as though she is not quite ready for sleep training. Try again the next week and then the week after if not ready the next week. I don't know what else to tell you Marianne...but I hope someone will chime in soon. Everything is a phase and she will outgrow this one. And Ferber (Ferber Method) says actually to put them to bed awake so they don't freak out when they wake in their crib and not alarmed that they are not in your arms. Thats all I can offer Marianne...so tough. Plus Ferber says to keep at the sleep training for 7 days. I hope some relief comes soon!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks guys! I have done some more research today and am not going to try CIO again. It was too hard and the research seems to sway on the side of it being possible harmful.
ReplyDeleteTry happiest baby on the block. Great options for CIO or not.
ReplyDeleteHere is what has worked for us. It sounds like she is overly tired. Make sure that she is not up for more then 2 hours at a time during the day. When she wakes for the day be sure to watch for her tired cues. If she is yawning, rubbing her eyes, or just seems to be getting cranky it is time to start your napping routine. We rock for just a few minutes then she goes in her crib awake. I never let my kids cry it out but I will let her fuss for just a few minutes. I don't mean screaming just fussing. If she is screaming get her up and try again in a little bit. If you miss her sleepy cues it will be harder to get her to sleep. I recommend the book healthy sleep habits happy child. You will need to tweek the methods in this book as it does recommend cio. Again I don't do cio but I do think most of the book has some really good tips in it. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteI just happened upon your blog and my youngest was the same way! Except she woke up every 45 minutes at night. Every. 45. Stinkin'. Minutes. The only way to get her back to sleep was to nurse her each time. I was so tired I couldn't spell my own name {true story}. I read the book Healthy Sleep Habit, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth and put what I read into practice, modifying it a bit to adapt to my baby's personality. Worked like a charm! I had about 3 nights of wanting to throw the book out the window, but after making it over the hump and getting 9 straight hours of sleep, I was doing the happy dance! That was when she was 8 months old. She's 2.5 now and sleeps from 6:45pm to 6:45 am. Every night! Sleep deprivation is absolutely the worst thing about parenthood. Hope you find the answers you're looking for!
ReplyDeletehttp://www.amazon.com/Healthy-Sleep-Habits-Happy-Child/dp/0449004023
Sleep is such a tough thing to figure out! And it can change so easily too!
ReplyDeleteA modified version of CIO worked for us (we would not let him CIO for more than 10 minutes) so I am sorry it has not worked for you. I must admit that my DH did this while I was away for the weekend as I could not handle the CIO method.
We also have used a noise machine in our little guy's room, which helped. There was a point where CIO did not work and we think the room was too dark so we put a night light in there. That seemed to help & then we also gave him a seahorse which lights up & plays music for 5 minutes. This really seemed to calm him down & has become a routine. We still use it and our little guy is 20 months.
Having a routine has also helped us tremendously. We eat dinner, have a bath, read a book or two and go to bed. When he was younger, we also turned down the lights much lower when we were reading a book to him to help signal that it was close to bedtime.
I hope you are able to figure out what clicks for you both!!
Do you have an email address? Our children sound similar and perhaps our experience can help. J. Reed, Texas
ReplyDeleteI bet you probably have more moms sympathizing with you than are commenting! Sleep is very important. Get it when you can. Some babies and kids are just better sleepers than others. We haven't done anything different (intentionally) with any of our children. My first had to be within touching distance to sleep until she was 1. The second didn't want us anywhere around when she slept (and she slept great)! The third is 5 months old. I have yet to figure out what will keep him asleep at night. He definitely is in the frequent nighttime wakings! He had some issues early on that took us a while to figure out, but now maybe he wakes out of habit? Unfortunately, I am not able to break this habit. Good luck! Just remember, there aren't too many teenagers waking in the middle of the night crying. At some point they do figure it out . . . Here's hoping they figure it out soon!
ReplyDeleteI just came across your blog, and I went through the same problem with BOTH my kids! It is so frustrating, especially when you hear of all these other babies sleeping in their cribs at 3 weeks:) With my first, I just gave in and let her sleep in our bed. With Brady(my youngest), I was determined to find something to help him sleep in his crib/co sleeper. We found out that he loves to sleep wrapped/swaddled, but he was kicking out. I read a great article on the miracle blanket, and tried that. It was our MIRACLE! Seriously, he sleeps like a baby most nights wrapped up in that. Since is has been so hot we have moved to muslin blankets. I hope it gets better for you soon!!
ReplyDelete